LET THEM, LET ME, AND LET GOD: FINDING PEACE IN CONFLICT

Peace and balance - 
Photo by Nandhu Kumar: https://www.pexels.com

Recently, I’ve started to notice something about myself: I have this strong tendency to avoid conflict. I shy away, not because I can’t handle confrontation, but because I just feel so tired. Emotionally tired, mentally tired—as if all my energy gets drained the moment a disagreement arises. I tell myself that growth is my goal. I want to become a better version of myself. And conflict? It often feels like a stumbling block in my path. Why would I willingly invite resistance when all I want is peace?

That’s where Mel Robbins’ “Let Them” theory comes into play. If someone wants to lie about me, let them. If they think poorly of me, let them. It’s not about letting others walk all over me; it’s about giving up control over what I cannot control. And so, as Mel suggests, from "Let Them", we shift to “Let Me.” Now, let me find my own peace. Let me focus on what I can control: my reactions, my thoughts, my growth. The combination of these two simple phrases feels empowering.

But here’s the thing about life—it doesn’t care about our plans. As much as I try to practice letting go, I can’t avoid every storm. No matter how much peace I seek, conflict still shows up at my door, uninvited and sometimes raging.

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This week was proof of that. I found myself in the middle of a dispute of a case that I have even managed to sweep under the rug for the entire year. I questioned myself why couldn't I keep it safe like I always do. But I guess, Dexter Morgan was right... "There's no secrets in life: just hidden truths that lie beneath the surface".

At first, I did what I always do: I wanted to run, but I chose not to and part of me regretted that. So I ended up blaming myself. But time—as it so often does—brought a little clarity. When the emotions settled, I began to see the truth hidden within this situation.

The person I was clashing with turned out to be a mirror of myself. A reflection of whom I used to be. I paused and thought: Wait. I know that behavior—I once did the exact same thing. I knew how she felt because I’d lived through those same emotions, those same struggles. Suddenly, I didn’t feel anger or frustration anymore. Instead, I felt compassion, not just for her but for me. I could see both of us as people trying to navigate a difficult moment. It was uncomfortable… but transformative.

That’s when I realized something much deeper was happening—something divinely orchestrated. God was revealing a hidden lesson, and for a moment, everything clicked. I was running on low energy, the kind that David Hawkins describes in his Map of Consciousness. At the very bottom of this map is “shame”—an energy so dense and heavy that Hawkins calls it a form of hell. And that struck me like lightning.

For a long time, I’ve carried silent shame with me. Small things, big things—it doesn’t matter. Shame has this way of burrowing itself into your soul, whispering lies that you’re not good enough, that you can’t change, that you don’t deserve more. I hadn’t even realized how much of my energy was getting consumed by it. It’s no wonder life has felt so exhausting. You can’t manifest higher-energy outcomes when you’re stuck at the bottom.

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The conflict? It wasn’t random. It was a wake-up call.

It felt like an epiphany. I realized I could no longer let shame dictate my energy. If I want to grow—truly, deeply grow—I have to transform this energy. I need to lift it, little by little, towards a higher state of consciousness. And maybe, just maybe, this experience was God’s way of guiding me toward that transformation. A nudge to say: You can’t avoid this work anymore. But it’s okay—I’m with you.

There’s something powerful about trusting divine timing. The moment when you realize that even the toughest, most uncomfortable moments come with a purpose. Yes, I still believe in “Let Them.” If people misunderstand me, that’s not my battle to fight. I also believe in “Let Me.” I owe it to myself to heal, to seek peace, to find clarity. But more than that, I’m learning to lean into the final step: “Let God.”

Let God guide. Let God reveal. Let God transform.

Conflict can’t always be avoided. Growth can’t always be painless. But sometimes the divine messages we so desperately need come wrapped in storms we never saw coming. It’s uncomfortable. It’s exhausting. But it’s also exactly what I needed. And for that, I’m grateful.